But in all the furore regarding the BBC it is
easy for us to forget the real victims – those who have suffered abuse and the
side-effects of it for many years. In some cases it has ruined their lives,
destroyed their self-esteem and made them afraid to take a full and active part
in society. Some have been relegated to being a mere shadow of the person they
could have been.
People who fall victim to abuse, whether as
children or adults, can end up in a dire situation with no one to turn to. We
often hear that people are afraid to speak about it in case they are
disbelieved or thought of as weak. Therefore they end up internalising their
problem and causing self-harm which may never be fully healed. Some are angry –
and don’t know how to express it. In situations like this, the victims are
desperate to escape and it’s easy to see why they would want to hit back at
those who abused them or even at society at large.
How do we react when we are too afraid to
vocalise our problems? What goes on inside a person who is desperately trying
to find release from the inner torment which robs them of their freedom?
I like to turn to the Old Testament for an
example of a man who felt ‘caged in’ - literally. In 1 Kings 19 verses 1-18 we
read about a man who is seen as a spiritual giant of the Old Testament times –
Elijah. Earlier chapters depict the man at his most awesome, drawing upon faith
resources which leave us amazed. And yet here in chapter 19 he is reduced to a
quivering wreck, afraid of Queen Jezebel who is intent on revenge for his
destruction of her much-loved Prophets of Baal.
How can a man fall from such a high-point to a
desperate low-point in such a short space of time? Anyone in ministry will know
that it is after some of the most powerful experiences of God that our
resources seem to be sapped and we look back with disbelief at what we achieved
only yesterday. John Wesley, fresh from his ‘heart-warming experience’ on May
24th 1738, woke up the next morning beset by questions about its
authenticity.
Looking at Elijah, he had all the symptoms of a
man depressed beyond measure. Reflecting on his exploits on Mount Carmel was
little comfort to him. The joy of his recent successes had evaporated into a
suicidal malaise. In verse 4 we read him lamenting to God, “I have had enough, Lord. Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” Wrapped up in his self-righteousness (verse 10),
he was painfully oblivious of the generosity being shown by God towards him. You
can imagine him crying out to God with the words, ‘I did all this for you – don’t
you remember!!!’. In the ‘earthquake, wind and fire’ episode which follows (verses
11 & 12) he is, no doubt, craving for God to manifest himself again in
dramatic ways. But God refuses, or, to put it more generously, God knows better
what Elijah needs – a still, small voice. In response to Elijah’s tirade of
anger, God simply whispers in his ears, ‘Go back Elijah’.
The one thing Elijah feared was just that –
going back. He was even told by God in verse 17 that his successor, Elisha, was
waiting in the wings. Elijah felt useless, devoid of self-esteem, yesterday’s
man and a spent force. No wonder he cried out to God in an attempt to hit back.
Who else could he shout at – no one would listen – and he would look such a
fool.
How often do we misdirect our anger? How often
do we get angry with people who simply don’t deserve our wrath? How often, in
moments of depression, do we cry out in anger because of a distorted view of
reality? God pointed out to Elijah in verse 18 that he was wrong to think that
he was now the only faithful one left. No less than 7,000 people in Israel had
kept their faith and were waiting for Elijah to return.
It is a telling lesson for us all. When we are
on the receiving end of someone’s anger we need to take a step back and not
simply listen to what they say, but more especially, listen to what they don’t
say. What had sparked their outburst? What are the hurts which have left a deep
wound on their spirit? What is their real need at this moment in time?
As we observe the traumas being experienced by
the BBC, let us not forget the damage done to so many in the past. Let us look
with real compassion on those who, for years, were unable to vocalise their
grief. Let us recognise their anger and respond, not with criticism or contempt,
but with that still, small voice which can bring healing and acceptance and
help them on the road back to the society they have struggled to participate in
for so long.
